It's been a rough one today. I don't know why necessarily but I don't like today and I want it to be over soon! This morning I went to Ballet class and yet again felt crushed. I hate to compare myself to others but, I do it so well that I don't even realize I am doing it. I used to be so much better at ballet.... you think I would have gotten back into it by now! Anyway, the epitome of my frustration was in the fact that I just couldn't do anything well enough. I got out of class feeling like the scum of the Earth and just wanted to give up.
By the time I got to work, I was still emotionally frustrated with myself. I knew that dwelling so much on my own issues was selfish and self destructive, so I pushed it all away and attended to my duties at work. We got to go to the "Roxy Theatre" in St. Anthony. It is an old worn down theatre that I am sure has been there forever. We brought our own movie and watched it on the big screen. When we finished, I helped load people into the vans and was trying to get people to move faster and still have fun. I started to act ridiculous so that they would laugh at me. They exceeded my expectation. One of them said to me, "Katie B, why are you so crazy?!" To which I explained that I like making them laugh cause it makes me happy and "I like being crazy." One of my clients said, "you never have a bad day do you?" That made me really happy. I'm so glad I was able to just push aside my own issues and help them have a good time. What a miracle!
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